Managing Adult ADHD

Adult ADD/ADHD:

managing symptoms and getting organised

ADHD is now well recognised in children in schools and colleges, but it is not by any means new. Many adults have grown up with ADHD undiagnosed, wondering what was wrong and why things never seemed to go right for them at school, in work, with friends and families.

Suddenly that diagnosis is there and many of the jigsaw pieces suddenly slot into place. The reasons you could not concentrate for long, could never remember anything, were being told you were slow, disorganised, kept losing things .....

Many other things can overlap with ADHD too, such as Autistic Spectrum Disorders, making social communication difficult, or Dyspraxia which may have made you feel unable to do all the things your friends could do – like riding a bike.

Other things can go hand in hand with ADHD such as Anxiety disorders and Depression – which may be how you came to finally get your diagnosis in the first place.

However, what do you do now? While you might understand now why things were the way they were in the past it doesn’t direct you to how you can improve everything in the future.

But there are some things you can do for yourself.

1. Support.

There are several organisations that provide information and support about ADD / ADHD – some local and some national, many online.

Try http://www.adhdandyou.co.uk as a starting point.

A good support network provides help and encouragement. Your doctor or counsellor may also be able to point you to local support. Sharing your experiences and listening to how others’ overcame challenges can be extremely helpful.

Let all your friends and family know – the more they understand you the more they can help.

Learn more about ADHD – try ADHD in Adults: A Psychological Guide to Practice by Susan Young and Jessica Bramham. Not a particularly light read but well laid out, lots of information and access to their website and downloadable programme helpsheets if you buy the book.

2. Be Healthy.

· You probably already have a problem with mood swings and organisation so decreasing stressors will increase your productivity and minimise your symptoms of anxiety.

· Develop a routine around going to bed - avoid caffeine late in the day, have a predictable, quiet bedtime routine, avoid watching television or working/playing on the computer until late, find a good but not too exciting (!) book and go to bed at the same time every night as far as possible.

· Eat more healthily. Be wary of processed foods, especially carbohydrates in the form of sugar as these can enhance your mood swings, feelings of anxiety and reduce your concentration further. Also the more of them you eat the more you will need, making the problem worse.

· Be as active as you can – you need somewhere productive to put your excess energy! Add exercise to your daily routine by walking instead of driving, taking extra effort with housework, running upstairs, pottering in the garden in nice weather (with the additional bonus of the fresh air!) Actively avoid getting sucked into addictive online games – you lose your day and any possibility of feeling better about yourself before you even know the time has gone. Even a few short bursts through the day will make a lot of difference.

3. Get organised.

· Don’t try to do everything at once. Choose a couple of easy things that you can change, like setting aside 10 minutes each morning to make a plan for the day and prioritise your jobs, plan in break times and times you need to be available for your children. Decide to check your e mail inbox only twice a day if you can.

· You will learn new skills as you go along. Don’t feel you have to do everything at once or try to be perfect – no one is! It will be too overwhelming and you will feel so much worse when you fail. Make your targets realistic – ones you know you can achieve.

· Remember - there will always be some people who are more organised than others – and there will be people without ADHD who are less organised than you.

4. Planning.

· Use an online calendar or organiser or buy a diary. Make it special and you are more likely to use it.

· Make a daily list. Set aside a few minutes each morning to write your list for the day. Plan in the things you MUST do and remember to plan in breaks for yourself. Be realistic about what you can actually manage to fit into your day. When you have ADHD you will find it easier to keep your tasks short or cut them down into smaller tasks to achieve the whole. Take a break of a few minutes between each part of a task – even if it is just a few minutes to rest and refresh your thoughts and energy.

· Review and Update your list each morning. Cross off the things you have achieved and add the bits that are still to do. Prioritise so you know what you have to do and leave off things that are not important or add them to another day so that your list is not overwhelming. Once it is written down you know you can’t forget but you also don’t have to think about it until it is time to deal with it.

5. Organising and filing.

· Set up a filing system that works for you. Use dividers or separate folders for different types of documents, label and categorise them (perhaps alphabetically) so you can find things easily when you need them. Keep on top of it! File it, do something about it or throw it away.

· Plan in time to file and sort things every week. Once you start it will feel more in your control and, over time, it will get easier to both deal with things and find them again when you need them.

6. Time Management.

· Give yourself more time than you think you need. For each 15 minutes of time you think it will take you to get somewhere or complete a task, add 5 minutes. Remember to add in travelling time and consider adding more time again to cope with traffic delays.

· Write down appointments for earlier than they’re really going to be – try adding in your travelling time too. Use online reminders or a clock to remind you of what you should be doing and when so that if you have been distracted you cannot forget.

· Be realistic about what you can achieve and make sure it is what YOU think you can achieve and not what someone else expects of you. It is too easy to underestimate how long a task will actually take. Consider that it will take longer - then any time left is a bonus! Otherwise you might feel like days have disappeared without you achieving what you set out to do, or you might feel you have too much to deal with and become anxious and overwhelmed so you cannot carry on.

7. Task management.

· Allow time between tasks so you can gather your thoughts. If you find your attention wandering during a task, especially if it is something boring or repetitive, do something else for a few minutes. Plan in frequent breaks, such as 20 minutes on task, then 5 minutes off.

· Break big tasks into smaller pieces. Take a break or a small change of task for a few minutes every 20 minutes or so. This is the length of time you might realistically be able to concentrate on one thing. Reward yourself for each achievement.

8. Money Matters.

· Plan into your daily/weekly/monthly diary times when payments need to be made otherwise they can easily be forgotten. Systems such as Google calendar allow you to repeat a task or appointment at regular intervals, including annually, so there is no excuse for forgetting it’s time to pay the TV licence or car tax. Additionally, if you pay everything by direct debit monthly or annually it’s all done for you. Keep an account of everything going in and out on your bank statement – and preferably do your own tracking and forecasting in an Excel spreadsheet so you are never caught out.

· Assess your financial situation – For one month keep an account of every penny you spend and where it goes. It’s time consuming but will give you an overall picture of just where your money disappears to and where you can cut back if necessary.

· Don’t allow yourself to shop on impulse. Shop with cash, prepaid cash card or debit card. Keep one credit card only for emergencies but put it somewhere safe – don’t take it out with you. Make a shopping list at home and stick to it and keep a running total of what you spend as you will forget later. Keep your till receipts safe for future reference. If you think you will be tempted by a particular shop or online site then stay away from it. Don’t allow yourself to be sucked into online games until you start having to pay for them – leave well before then and find something else to do.

Work performance.

· As you become more self aware about your ADHD you can make use of that knowledge to arrange your working conditions for your optimum comfort. Arrange an area or ask to work in conditions where it is quiet if that is what you prefer, or arrange to work with headphones on and your own music if possible. Plan one task at a time if that is what you need or organise a routine to follow. If your working conditions are too stressful and can’t be adapted it’s time to look for a change.

· Most people are more productive at the beginning of the day. Plan your day so the tasks that are most important and take most concentration are done at times when you can manage them best. Leave less important tasks for later and remember to take frequent task breaks to refresh your mind and refocus.

· Focus your energy on your strengths, not your weaknesses. If you're paying attention to your weaknesses, then your weaknesses are going to grow. That's why it's so important to pay attention to what you do well. You "grow" your strengths and talents by focusing on the things you do well.

· Don’t jump straight into a decision or task on impulse. Consider its importance and how much time you can allow it. Otherwise mistakes can happen and things that were important forgotten in the process. Plan everything!

Relationships.

· Focus on the speaker and on what is being said as the most important information you need to hear right now. If necessary, check with the speaker to make sure you got the information right. Try to make your questions and comments relevant. If you have something else to say you will get your turn.

· Pause after expressing each point in a conversation, and wait for a response before continuing to talk. Engage the listener, then listen carefully to the other person’s response.

· Rehearse social skills with a friend or support group, such as turn taking in the conversation - focusing on other people’s words and waiting for a response. Choose role models at work and in your personal life and watch how they communicate. Watch and practice interpreting body language and facial expressions. Try reading The Definitive Guide to Body Language by Allan and Barbara Pease.

· Becoming a good listener doesn’t mean you have to hide your knowledge or sense of humour, or not share in what is going on around you. You can be fun – and have fun without monopolizing the conversation.